my beautiful disaster ( part 17 )

' eff 7adde im in the mood for a laugh 3ad .. goolay goolay , ' I said with a very weak smile since I was too sick to even speak

But before Soso could open her mouth my aunty Salwa came ' Yalla ka il Dr. yaay 7beebtee..'
When Soso looked at her she gave me the " I'll tell you later " look

' Okay..' I said and looked the other way , I was so tired and my mind was only thinking of one thing..

Faris I miss you .. I wonder lo tdree ana hnee because of missing you this much shetsawee ?

' Weee 6a3aw ! neseet talefoonee bil sayara ! aroo7 ayeeba wared ..' my aunt Salwa said

Then Soso came and whispered ' He's outside waiting Angel.. he sent those flowers with me but I told everyone that I brought them..'


My heart almost jumped out of my chest when she told me that

I was too tired to cry some more

If that’s the same Faris that was lying, if that was the same Faris that didn’t realy love me.. why would he risk coming here only to see me ? to make sure I was okay ?


Just then my aunt Salwa , my mom and the Dr. showed up


' Il salam 3leeko ..' the Egyption Dr. greeted me with a huge smile on his face


' Ha dr. , shfeeha benty ? ' my mom asked worried


His face changed completely when my mom asked him that

' Things don’t look so good am afraid.. '


' What do you mean !?' my mom almost yelled at him


' Angel feha eltehab re2awee 7ad .. it could be fatal if we don’t take action.. now theres no need to worry because we CAN control that , but we may have to take her in..'

My mom almost cried when she heard that , my aunt Salwa held her arm and she tried to look strong for me ..

' Mama please mabee anam bil mostashfa ! ma7eb ! mabee!! '


' Angel you have to sweetie ma negdar n5aleech chthy..'


' Mama enty t3rfeen my history with hospitals ! ma7ebhom mama please! Dr. la t5aleenee anam hnee ma7eb ! '


' Its only for a few days , and then we'll let you out as soon as we see progress , your case is very dangerous you cant be exposed to the weather outside ..'


' Dr. please isn’t there anyway I can get a nurse that can come home with us ? I cant stay here ! PLEASE! '


He looked at me and I could tell kesart 5a6ra ..

' Angel I want to show you something ..' he said and held up my X-rays towards the white light , all I could see is the thin lines of my lungs and what looked like thick white smoke inside them

' You see that white thickness inside your lungs ? that’s an infection.. all of it ..am sorry to tell you this way but you have to understand you are very sick ..'


' Dr. what are you going to do ? I mean how are you going to treat it ? ' my mom asked


' She has to take daily doses of her medicine along with an injections for a whole week until we see some good results ..'


' So I cant take all that at home ? ' I didn’t give up I really did NOT want to stay in the hospital !


He looked at me ' you insist on going home ? '


' Yes '


' I'll be right back '

It was only a few minutes till another Dr. came along with him


' You know what you're getting yourself into young lady ?' the other Dr. asked me but he was Kuwaiti

' Dr. whats the difference if I stay here or in my home where im comfortable ? '

' You can NOT be exposed to the horrible weather outside ,'


' I promise I'll never go out ! it would be the same ! except im gona be happier and more relaxed in my house ! and I'll come here everyday for my injection or I'll have a nurse in my house or anything ! '


He smiled at me ' Mom you have to promise us that she'll be here everyday and don’t let her go out a lot and take good care of her , you know mostly these cases are caused by the stress that the person is going through .. so try to make her as happy and relaxed as possible ..'


' Will do Dr. thank you very much ..' my mom tells him


' Heeey you got what you wanted after all ! ' Soso yelled out


' 3ad 9ij deerbalich 3la nafsech wela ra7 tshoofeen nafsech hnee again ! ' my aunt Salwa was very relieved


As my mom and aunt Salwa walked the Dr.s' to the door , Soso got a call and went outside too


Then a nurse came to me ' a young man asked me to give this to you ' She said with a sweet smile


It was a cute off white card with silver and gold little hearts all over it but this time I knew who sent this ..

Faris..

Im so sick without you too baby , allah yshafeech w maya7remny minich

Yours,
Faris


Baby ! tears filled my eyes but I still remembered what I heard about him and even if it wasn’t true.. I can never be with him .. never

I hid the card in my bag and started getting up to leave the awful place


I went home and everyone was there ! lots and lots of family members came to check up on me with lots of gifts , flowers , cards ! you name it !


I loved them !

For a whole week I relaxed, took long naps , drank a lot of milk and soup , and always wore lots of comfy PJ's ..


Whenever I felt sad or bad I would look at the card Faris gave me , and remember the great times we had


This time I didn’t cry , I wasn’t sad at all


I was happy ! I was happy and I didn’t care what people said or did to make me feel bad

I knew Faris !


I spent all this time with him !


I get to judge whether he loves me or not ! or whether he's lying or not !


Faris was my baby and he always will be..

Two weeks passed and I went to my checkups regularly and things were getting better il 7mdelah ,


All that freakishly scary white smoke was starting fade off and I felt A LOT better , physically and emotionally ..

Even though I wasn’t with Faris , he was with me all the time

In my heart and keeping me strong


His love made me strong

And the best part was that I knew he was there for me , like he always been ..


After that tragic sickness ended a lot of my friends came to visit and I never felt lonely NOT ONCE !


Thanks to my Rawaa everyone knew about this and they came to cheer me up and help me push all the hard times away


' Rawoo2 I never said thank you ..'

' 3la shno babe ? '

' For always being here for me .. I love you girl..'


' I love you too A , etha masawaitlich enty chthy asawee 7g mnoo ? '


' Speaking of which hows Snorlaxech !!? '


' Ehh.. we're going through some rough time .. I think its about to end .. we're fighting a lot A..'


' Heey sweetie 3adee we all go through fighting and stuff its normal ! '


' I know but its just not the same anymore you know ? '


' hmmm.. Rawoo2 shfeennaaa ? we started this together ! and we're ending this together !! '


' Ambee I know ! 9ij we're best friends !! '

' I know !! '

And we laughed so hard ! GOD I loved how we were so much alike but I sure didn’t love the way things are going with our love lives but having each other made things a lot easier ..


After Rawoo2 went home I stayed near the TV watching Oprah when the phone rang and Flow answered


' Aloo.. HI aunty Salwaaa !! yes am good ! yea Angel is good ! kahee gam t6ali3 tv w magam t5aleenna n6ali3 ! ' she gave me a look


' ANA ! ANA ! ANA BATKALLAAM !! ' my sister meems shouted out and went straight to the phone

' Eheheheeeheeeeheeeeehhhhh ! ' she was laughing like crazy !


' Wain Fariiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssss bakalmaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ' she continued


Then my heart kind of STOPPED , I even forgot he goes there a lot

Faris - like me – was the kids favorite.. they ADORED him ! especially my sisters, he always told me that if me and him didn’t get married he would marry one of my sisters and I always yelled at him for saying that..


I smiled when I remembered that .. just then meems threw the phone on my lap


' AAA777 !! what ? ..'


' Yaboonich ..'


' Aloo..'

Silence


' Meems who is it ? … MEEMS !! ??...' both of my sisters ran upstairs


' Aloo.. ' I said again


' Aloo..' His voice came softly to my ears


I took a long deep breath


And another one !


And then I just shut the phone !


' ambee .. ' I whispered to myself

' Ambee shfeeneee 7mdelah wel sheker !! zain leesh sadeeteee yal '3abeyya !! '

OMG ! look at me am talking to myself !!

How long has it been since I last heard his voice ? or saw his face ?

Two months ? yes two months that I managed to survive without the love of my life ..


Later I called Rawoo2 and told her what happened


' Wenty mynoonaa!!?? Lesh sadeeteee!!! ?? '


' Madree Rawooooo2 !! 5eft!! Te9arwa3t!! madree sh9ar feneee'


' Malat 3leech ana agool ! '

' Eff mo mohim now yalla am gonna get me some warm milk and go to bed ..'


' I'll come by tomorrow okay ? '


' see you later babe love you .. '


And when I was done with my milk I put my sleepy head on the pillow when my phone beeped


" ya 7loo 9ootich , lil7een yred fene il roo7 wallah ! "


I felt like I couldn’t breathe ! and before I had time to do anything ! it RANG !! IT WAS HIM !!

I let it ring .. and ring and ring.. until I couldn’t take it anymore !


' Alooo..'


' Ya 7loo hal 9oot…'



' Faris…'


' 3yoona .. 7ayat Faris kilha enty aamraay.. shtabeen ? feech shay ? me7taja shay ? fe shay y3awrech ? il marath gam yzeed ? shfeech gooly te7achay !? '


' Besmilah wenta 3a6aitny facha ? '


He laughed ,


God I miss his laugh !


How can you miss someone when the'yre talking to you at the same time ?


' redeeelee..'


'Shnoo ?! '


' you heard me .. '


' Faris wely 9ar ? wely 9ar fene ? w feek ? kil hatha shensawee fe ? '


' N5aly il nas twally … you don’t actually think I lied A did you ? '


' Fa..'


' Don’t A please.. whatever they said it wasn’t true .. I love you and you love me ! '


I just sat there … I didn’t say a word I couldn’t I didn’t know what to say


' We cant be together .. '


' Why not Angel ? baby please give me one reason ! '


' My parents ! the family ! Faris what if they find out !? we're DEAD! '


' What are you talking about ? il 7ob mo 7aram.. wana mo yay al3ab ana yay a5thech bil 7alal ! bas enty ma3a6eeteenee fer9a ! w il nas allah ysame7hom ! mayaboon a7ad yestanas ! ..'


' Faris please..'


' Don’t Angel please ! ni9 il 3alam ydree enny amoot feech ! wallah shahed enna mako bglbee '3air neyya 9afya ! abeech ana w shareech ! abeech 7aggee !! abee a3eesh weyach le a5er la7tha mn 3omree … '


My eyes started tearing up again


' Faris I cant …'


' Hatha a5er kalam ? '


' Eee a5er kalam ..'

' Allah ywafgech 7yaty.. its weird how I love you So much that im welling to let you go like that.. I must be crazy .. fe a7ad 3endal goomar mn il sema w y5aleeh ? mynoon hatha… wana dam gam asawee chthy akeed mynoon.. listen to me I love you t3rfeen ? all I can say is allah ywafgech..'


' Wenta b3d .. allah ywafgek w yarzegek bkil 5air ..'


' Bye Angel..'


' Goodbye Faris..'



What did I just do !

I sat there for 15 seconds exactly !! When I grabbed my phone again and started calling his number again


Before it even rang he picked up it was like he was waiting !


' A7ibik\ch !! ' we both said at the same time.. as soon as the phone lines got connected together


He laughed


' Faris ! I do !!! I do love you !! I love you a lot !! I don’t want to leave you ! I don’t care what people say I cant live without you ! OMG ! I got a frekin DISEASE when you left me ! Faris …' I started crying now


' 7yaty..'


' Chub !! I LOVE YOU !! CHUB OKAY !!??? CHUB FARIS CHUB !!! CHUB !!! ' I just went hysterical


That’s what Faris did to me .. he made me go crazy.. and when I was mad or crazy he would laugh and make things all good again


' Baby let me talk..'


' La2 mo kaifik !! mo kaifik chthy te5tefy b3dain te6la3ly ! just when I moved on ! tyee terja3 ! ma agdar ! I spent Way much time crying over you ! '


' Angel I love you .. '


' I LOVE YOU TOO YOU DUMASS! '


He laughed at me again


' Redeelee Angel.. redee roo7ee… redeee nabthee 7g galbee.. '


I sniffed

' Is that a yes ? ' he said with a laugh


' No..' I told him

' That’s a lot of yeses ! '