Once upon a lie 4

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" I .. Am sorry i had to tell your dad over the phone Wahab i really am .. " Those words came out of the man I've always hated




Words of sorry and regret ..




But they didn't ease my pain , not even a little bit.



I knew he lost his daughter too , i knew i was the one who was supposed to apologize and at least give my condolences



But i was too paralyzed to say anything



" How did she just go like that? " My voice was not loud and i wasn't shouting this time , but anger and rage were clear in it




" 3bdelwahab .. yuba yalla 5alna nrou7 " My dad took my arm scared i was going to attack the man, " NO! " i suddenly pulled away from him




" I want to KNOW " i saw fear in her father's eyes , like he was scared i was going to do something crazy




And that's what my dad was thinking too " 3bdelwahab .. 9al 3al nibii yuba hatha yoomha , emsh 5al nrou7 el bait roo7 rayi7 w 9allik chm rek3a "





I breathed hard , in and out and i could feel them just staring at me




The noise that came out of my lungs wasn't normal at all , i looked like a wild bear who came out of his cave just to attack them




Her father didn't say a single word to me. I let my father drag me to the car and drive away , but i still watched him from the side mirror




Waiting for something ..




Maybe for her to come out , maybe for a nightmare to be over ..




But nothing.




I knew several days later that her family had all gone away somewhere , i didn't know where exactly and i didn't care




I never went by her house again and i didn't want to




Everyday the conversations with my dad would become shorter and shorter. There came days where we didn't even talk at all.




There were days where i'd come home accompanied by the police , or a kind stranger who found me drunk and lost ..



There were days where i'd start mumbling things in my sleep that my father never really understood




I stopped seeing my friends .. i stopped talking to anyone ,




My only way of communicating was by shouting or hitting things or people..




My dad wanted to give me space , time for me to heal but i wasn't doing anything useful at all



That continued for exactly two and a half years



I went out of line



WAY out of line



It wasn't until this day .. when my father found me laying on the front doorsteps in the early hours of the morning



Drunk out of my mind til i fainted and lay there ..




My dad grabbed me and threw me in the shower , and when he saw that i gained a little strength and my head was slowly coming back to reality .. he gave it to me



" THAT's IT !! HATHY MO 7ALA YA 9BAY NESAIT AHALIK , NESAIT DEENIK , NESAIT NAFSIK !! ANA KNT ABEE A9EER METFAHIM , KNT GAYIL 7ALA W T3ADDEE .. KNT T7EBHA MA GILNA SHAY , BAS EL SALFA ZADAT 3N 7aDHA YA WaHAB .. IT'S BEEN 2 YEARS FOR GOD'S SAKE "



Though i wasn't really in the right state of mind , though i didn't hear all the words right




I understood very well what my father was saying ..



I knew i was in trouble , i was a mess




I was in need of a serious intervention , and i got it that day




The next day , when i finally had some rest and was able to put the pieces of yesterday together i went to my father




I sat down on a chair in front of him not sure what to say




" Look son , i know it's hard i swear i do .. but just try , you have to try living .. you can't go on like this. Am so sorry for your loss but it's not the end of the world , it may be a beginning of a new life for you .. "




I was too embarrassed to look my father in the eye , he was my father .. my Idol .. he was all i had ..




And i acted out and made a fool of myself , i embarrassed him and let him down and i had no idea how to make it better




" I am your father " He went on " And it's my job to help you through life son , you're not alone in this "




My heart fell as i heard those words , i really respected that man .. he was a hell of a father and an amazing man




And i realized i needed him to say those words to me , to snap me back into reality




" That's why we're going to start something new .. we're opening a new leaf "



I looked up at him and waited for him to continue




" Get your stuff ready , we're going back to Kuwait "




As soon as i heard those words , it was like my ears were shut out not wanting to hear anything else




" A-Am sorry dad , what did you say? "




" Gilt benred el Kwait , ent lazm tred deertik .. lazm t'3ayer 7yatik w tkamilha .. warak jam3a warak shi'3il w warak mas2ooliya , manee mga3dik hnee wala degeega akthar. w 6ayaratna t6eer bacher "




I was too shocked to say anything .. but deep down inside , his words didn't sound so bad ..



For the first time in 2 years , i felt like i was actually looking forward to something




Something great was going to happen



Something new



Something that can at least keep me going




It was a long flight and i couldn't wait for it to end




I sat there with my father , already bonding again




Making up for lost times as they say ..



I apologized to him over and over again




I couldn't stop thinking of how my new life would be like




What i was going to do ,




But it was exciting and all my patience had ran out




I finally heard the captain speak , we were soon landing at Kuwait's national Airport




I smiled




The whole process in the airport went smoothly , people were indescribable





They were nice and friendly , i was actually relieved to see familiar Kuwaiti faces around me




And as soon as we got out of the arrivals gate , i breathed in hard and took in the new atmosphere in front of me



The faces of anticipating people waiting for their loved ones, flowers and chocolates awaited on so many hands , kids were running around or hanging by the silver bars




And all i could think to myself was ' Wow. This feels good already '




" Welcome home son " i heard my dad whisper and i smiled




Far in the left side corner , i saw a familiar grinning face




I wasn't sure who it was , but when we got closer i recognized the eager young man facing us




" EG3AAAD BO SHMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIISSSS ! " I suddenly shouted and took him in my arms



" Hala bil 7beeeeeeeeeb !! " As my cousin patted my back , i felt something fall into place




I felt something nudge me and say " hey .. you're finally home " BOy did this feel right




It just felt RIGHT.